by Kat | Jan 27, 2023 | General, In This Moment
The “January Thaw” has been more like the “January Revolving Door” in my neighborhood… wintery-mix-rain-repeat. Proof of this weird weather is evident with this: I have Snowdrops that with 5 minutes of sunshine will likely bloom today (I will be watching to get a photo!) and the chives are coming up in my garden. Apparently they are the Harbingers of No Winter Here!
But it’s been a week… at least for me, and of course… I have thoughts!
Remembering —
David Crosby, still. Yes, there was a tear or ten shed. I really liked him… and had newfound love for him because of his tweets. My all time favorite album, Wind on the Water, contains my all time favorite song: Carry Me. It is hope that he is now reunited with his mother and they are singing together. If you want to spend a little time reminiscing with his music… you will find 10 excellent songs here.
Irritate, Inflame, Irk —
As in what every doctor should try not to do with any patient…ever! Yes, it has been a few days since I visited “the new doctor” and I am happy to say that I have moved past the tears, depression, and anger rage phases. (Although, it took a minute, some incredibly supportive texts from a dear friend, and a new gnome to move past it all…) I begin today with a game plan… which may or may not include said physician. But I wanted to take a minute to talk about being your own best health care advocate because let’s face it… I think there are WAY more physicians like the one I saw on Monday and very few like my much loved and often longed for physician from Holland! I am saying this as a reminder to myself because I am a great advocate for others, but somehow don’t feel that I am worthy of the same treatment. The best advice I got in my Days of Moping was this… remember the doctor works for you! I have been approaching “finding a physician” similarly to how I felt about Dr. DePree in Holland… there was a camaraderie between us. We had children the same age, who went to school together, we served on committees together, we occasionally bumped into each other socially. In short, I have been wanting to find a physician that I liked… and who liked me as well. Silly me… this person works for me, he or she does not have to like me. But they do have to treat me with respect, they have to listen (more than they talk), and yes… I can demand that they not look at me and pull out their canned speech for “aging, fat, women” of diet, drink more water, and exercise. I should have stopped him in the midst of this diatribe, but I was hurt and stunned that this was even happening. He never asked me what I like to be called, he never used my name… once. But… as I said at the beginning of this… I have a game plan to move forward. I had about eleventy billion vials of blood drawn this morning and when those results are back, I am going to make another appointment with the Nurse Practitioner and I will talk with her about my hip pain issues (and perhaps even my blood test results, lol) and if that turns out to be as epic a fail as the physicians appointment… then I will be back at square one, finding a new physician. But maybe, just maybe… I will find that the NP will be as lovely as Dr. DePree is and find that this office will work just fine (and never, ever see that damned doctor again! LOL)
Finding —
My way with my new word. It has had some hiccups… because, of course it has, right? But in the midst of wondering why on earth I picked this word… I have had at least one thing happen each day that reinforces this word. The best one this week was a poem read by the new host of The Slowdown. (You can listen to Major Jackson share his thoughts and read the poem here) I wrote these lines from Paul Laurence Dunbar’s poem The Mask in my journal:
We wear the mask that grins and lies,
It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes,—
This debt we pay to human guile;
With torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
And mouth with myriad subtleties.
Why should the world be over-wise,
In counting all our tears and sighs?
Nay, let them only see us, while
We wear the mask.
Finally Finished —
Yesterday I had a BIG FINISH! I spun all the yarn the “Great Sweater Spin” and yesterday I gave it a nice spa treatment, a good bit of thwacking, and then hung up all my skeins to dry. And the yarn turned out beautifully! So beautifully!
One big ‘ole pile of yarn!
This afternoon my plan is to wind up one of the “smaller skeins” and start swatching to find a fabric I like. Once I have done that, I will pick a pattern… which absolutely is the best way to knit a sweater. Find a yarn you like, knit with said yarn to find the fabric you like, measure the gauge of that swatch and then find a pattern that matches your gauge!
And with that, I say… Let The Weekend Begin! See you all back here on Monday with my Bumpy Start with my Word update! Happy Weekend all!
by Kat | Jan 25, 2023 | General, Unraveled Wednesday
Greetings Unravelers!
This week is truly a week for unraveling… issues. So let’s get started!
First, I thought I’d give you all a very brief update on my experiences at the new doctor yesterday. No… there were no C3PO-style staff. Whew, right? But I am still “digesting” my visit and whether the doctor is a keeper or…not. However, I am having bloodwork done on Friday morning, because of course, right?
But The Big Issue that I need help with is my Temperature Embroidery project!! I have completed 19 days but I have run into a bit of a hiccup and I have been at a bit of a standstill until I can figure out a solution to my problem! I am doing woven wheels for each day and, honestly… I just love how they look and I don’t want to switch to something else! But here is my issue, those little wheels don’t play nicely with an embroider hoop and I wrecked a couple of them as I moved along the line of days …in the first row. I posted an image on IG and the pattern designer suggested a frame contraption that I hand turn. And since I could see that the hoop issue was just going to continue to be an enormous problem, so I bought one but boy… is this the most awkward thing ever created?!? I have not found a rhythm for how to use this monstrosity but stitching a woven wheel with no frame or hoop is a no go…because a lack of tension makes for sloppy woven wheels! So… if any of you have any tips or tricks on how to use the wooden frame… I’d appreciate them so I can happily return to stitching!
There has been the tiniest bit of making this week!! I have a completed pair of mitts just in time for the return of some wintry mix-style weather! They have been a welcome addition to my morning outings with Sherman!
I also cast on a new gnome. This gnome has yet to whisper any advice to me, but perhaps I am just not listening. I will forge ahead with the arms today… and maybe then we shall see if this gnome needs a beard… or some braids!
The reading this week has been good – I finished The Revolutionary: Samuel Adams (with mixed feelings) and have started listening to A Constellation of Vital Phenomena. I am just settling in with it and have no thoughts at all about it yet but I love the title!
I finished reading the soon-to-be-published Allende book, The Wind Knows My Name. I know that last week I was not sure if the book would fall into the “so very good or not so good at all” categories but, as it turns out, I ended up liking it very much! It is not a typical Allende book, but that does not make it bad… imo. Anyways, it is a book that I have not stopped thinking about – which is what I think Ms. Allende wanted…a book that will niggle at you, and this book is that!
As such I have found it hard to settle in with a new book so I started reading an essay or two from Ross Gay’s Book of Delight’s before bed and it is so delightful!
I also started the most appropriate post-doctor appointment book: The Swedish Art of Aging Exuberantly by Margareta Magnusson (of The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning) After Monday’s appointment, I needed a healthy dose of levity… and thank you, dear Margareta for starting with gin! (Yes, chapter one is about drinking with friends!)
I want to thank all of you in advance for any tips for using that embroidery frame… and I want to know what’s on your mind today!
As always, if you wrote a post to share please leave your link below and thank you!
by Kat | Jan 23, 2023 | General, In This Moment
Brings the dreaded long awaited doctors appointment.
Yes, I am a bit nervous. A new doctor. A new office. A new system…although if the pre-check in text that I got on Friday is a hint, it might be easier!
AND… 20 minutes before my appointment I will get another text with a link to click when I am in the building. Perhaps there is less to be nervous about that I thought… but then, last night, I dreamed that the office was filled with a very C3PO-like staff. Creepy. Very creepy.
Anyways, I am expecting a score of tests and perhaps an idea or two for something “different” to do (not take) for my painful left hip, and Saturday I got my “annual mammogram reminder” so yeah… all.the.things!
After the doctor visit, I am heading to the grocery store… which is conveniently located near my new doctor…a place that is a Bot-Free Shopping Zone! Haha!
See you all back here on Wednesday with some Unraveling!
by Kat | Jan 19, 2023 | General, Poetry
I first heard this poem a couple of years ago and late last year, I got myself a new book for my Poetry Library (Happy Birthday to ME!) and I was happily surprised to find it there as well.
This poem is for teachers everywhere, who teach all the amazing things every single day.
What You Missed That Day You Were Absent From Fourth Grade
by Brad Aaron Modlin
Mrs. Nelson explained how to stand still and listen
to the wind, how to find meaning in pumping gas,
how peeling potatoes can be a form of prayer. She took
questions on how not to feel lost in the dark
After lunch she distributed worksheets
that covered ways to remember your grandfather’s
voice. Then the class discussed falling asleep
without feeling you have forgotten to do something else —
something important — and how to believe
the house you wake in is your home. This prompted
Mrs. Nelson to draw a chalkboard diagram detailing
how to chant the Psalms during cigarette breaks,
and how not to squirm for sound when your own thoughts
are all you hear; also, that you have enough.
The English lesson was that I am
is a complete sentence.
And just before the afternoon bell, she made the math equation
look easy. The one that proves that hundreds of questions,
and feeling cold, and all those nights spent looking
for whatever it was you lost, and one person
add up to something.
From Everyone at This Party Has Two Names by Brad Aaron Modlin. Copyright © 2016 by Brad Aaron Modlin. Originally published by Southeast Missouri State University Press.
We (Bonny, Kym, and myself) would love for you to join us and share a poem that you love!
I will see you all back here on Monday!
by Kat | Jan 18, 2023 | General, Unraveled Wednesday
Greetings dear Unravelers!
We are racing through January… yikes! As I am typing this I cannot believe that the month is more than half over.
Big hint… Thus far, I don’t have much to show for the month!
I have reached the halfway point in my Pressed Flowers Wrap…I think five more “repeats” of flowers and I will be at the point where I will go back to the closely mingled flower pattern, which for me was a bit tricky to keep track of, but for now it remains super simple knitting!
Last year, I determined I needed a new pair of fingerless mitts. Well… I finally have one done! I have done some modifications to the pattern (it is Hermoine’s Mitt’s and it is free on Ravelry) I knit 8 rows of ribbing on the cuff and at the finger-side I really changed it up. I knit enough ribbing to have a fold over cuff, which I think will be very lovely if it ever gets cold again here in Pittsburgh! LOL I cast on for the second mitt last night, but it was too dark to get a photo. Hopefully, mitt two will be done sooner than it’s mate was!
But I have really been jonesing to cast on a sweater or two!
First Ann, of Ann and Kay, reminded me how much I really love her Destination Pullover. Then Vera mentioned it. And then I went to look for yarn in colors that are dark and moody like Ann’s… I might have a cart full at some online retailer.
Said cart might also include the yarn to knit Vár as well. Yes… I might even have envisioned the subtle changes I would make to it if I knit it!
Anyways… in an attempt to really contemplate the making of two sweaters, I am letting the cart simmer a bit before clicking “check out”… and if the colors are gone before I get to that stage, then it was not meant to be. And I am very okay with that!
Because this year is the year of being entirely authentic… I am sharing my Moody Painting from this week’s lesson (thanks Kym for that GREAT adjective, lol) I have miles and miles to go on my watercolor journey and this painting reminded me of that. I am thankful for Steve for reminding me that laughter is a very good thing… and sometimes laughing at yourself is the best solution for doing a Moody Painting! I hope this week’s critique gives me some good tips for fixing all the issues I had, lol!
Let’s move on to reading, shall we? I am three weeks in to Pádraig Ó Team’s Poetry Unbound book.. and can I just say it might have been the best three weeks ever in a January that I can remember! I have spent time with Wonder Woman, Book of Genesis, and Phase One. The impact that spending time with these poems has been incredible… the perfect start to any January, but especially this January!
I am also more than halfway through Allende’s The Wind Knows My Name… this is a book that somehow does not feel like an Allende book. I thought it was going one place at the start, but then she headed off in a different direction… or did she? (at least that is what I am asking myself as I try and figure out how all these lines will converge and where they might go!) I am not disliking it, but I right now I am not loving it either… and yet… I can’t stop reading because I have to know where she is taking me!
My “Daytime Listen” is The Revolutionary: Samuel Adams. I am about 2 hours in and am enjoying the writing, the history, and the “characters”!
And, that is about enough… right? LOL Anyways, I want to know what are you itching to cast on! (in case I need to add anything else to my cart! LOL)
As always, if you wrote a post to share please leave your link below and thank you!
I will be back tomorrow with our monthly Gathering of Poetry! And remember, you are welcome to join us if you are so moved!
by Kat | Jan 16, 2023 | General, In This Moment
…is for remembering.
Out of the mountain of despair, a stone of hope. — MLK Jr.
I have long been a fan of Martin Luther King Jr. and I loved his “I have a dream” speech… and have watched it dozens and dozens of times. It provides the most “cherry picked” quotes by the GOP and I am sure that you will hear their favored line quoted loud and long today. I am pretty sure that Dr. King would point out their lack of understanding… because he had a quote for that as well:
Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
This weekend I have spent time pondering what Dr. King would think of the status of the world today and I think he might agree that the more things change, the more they stay the same. We might not have lynchings today but what we have might be even worse…police killings (in a sickening number… The WaPo has been tracking police shootings since 2015. I am gifting this link to the data so you can all look at it, if you’d like – I know, it’s a lot for a Monday morning.)
One person’s name was glaringly absent from the 40 persons who have been killed by police in January… yes, that is in the 15 days of this month… shocking, I know. However, this data does not contain the name of the young teacher and father who flagged down police for help… Keenan Anderson. Why not? Well… the police did not shoot him, they tazed him to death.
This weekend, I have been thinking much about Mr. Anderson, Dr. King, and the 8,124 people who have been killed by the police since 2015 and it all feels like the most overwhelming mountain of despair…
But what about that stone of hope?
I believe, perhaps as Dr. King did… that all of us are those stones of hope….
A daunting task? Yes, absolutely. But together… all those stones of hope eventually make a mountain of hope, no?
And, in case you need a starting point, a bit of guidance… Mr. Anderson’s cousin has written an excellent book to get you on your way!
I will see you all back here on Wednesday.
