A Timely Beginning | January 2024

A Timely Beginning | January 2024

A new year, a new month, a new word… (and at least one of these things is a very good thing!)

This month I spent my some of my time “unpacking time” a bit. I found that I had quite a few “boxes” to look through as this word began showing up for me last April! I am thankful to my previous self for setting aside so many of the pieces of time that crossed my path last year. I am finding them just as timely now as I did then… and I am ending the month having a new love for what one little word can do for me.

I started where I always start with a word… I turn to the dictionary and begin with the definitions of time. I have written down those definitions… Time as a noun and Time as a verb.

  • Time, noun: The indefinite continued process of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole. (i.e.  my life)
  • Time, verb: plan, schedule, or arrange when (something) should happen or be done. (i.e. the time of my day)

And with those thoughts in mind, I focused on Jenny Odell’s delightful question:

“What other kinds of time? “

I started with Jenny’s thoughts on Chrónos (quantitative time) and Kairos (deep time). I went back and listened to Jenny’s conversation here about her book, Saving Time. I dug deeper into the idea of Chrónos [time, duration (taken from Merriam Webster)] and Kairos [Fullness of time; the propitious moment, especially for decision or action. (taken from the Oxford Dictionary)]. And Googling Chrónos and Kairos provided the most delightful rabbit hole… I spent a good bit of time wading around there!

I surprisingly stumbled across another delightful Time Rabbit Hole when I listened to a conversation with Paul Salopek. He introduced me to the idea of geological time… time in which we walk in the paths of ancestors. I loved, loved, loved this idea! And it made me think of all the things I do today… that have been done by thousands of people before me. I came up with quite a list… reading, knitting, sewing, cooking, cleaning… I mean… all of my day is spent doing things that others have done. This made me look at some of those things on my list in a new way. I can spend less time doing laundry than ancestors did… I have the benefit of having an automatic washer and dryer. Yes, I have to fill them… but  then I can walk away and do something else with my time. I am not spending my time beating clothes on a rock at a river… just saying.

Paul Salopek also talked about time connections… i.e. He noted that time connected to nature “slows down” versus time connected to cities, urban areas, and technology “sped up.” Jenny Odell talks about this as well but in terms “linear” and “vertical” time. Linear time being tied to work… and vertical time are those moments when time seems to stand still… which she noted most profoundly when she was out in nature!

In my Contemplation of Time this year… I want to reconsider the time of my day… or as Tolkien said:

All we I have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us me. 

I know one thing for sure… the amount of time I have left is decreasing daily and so I want to spend my time in better ways. I want to find more things that bring “vertical” time… those moments where I don’t feel the drag of time, but rather am lost from time.

And there you have my timely beginning… I am so excited to spend a year focused on time!

As always, I want to thank Carolyn for gathering us all together as we dig deep into our words! It is a delightful community of “worders” and I always learn something from all the participants!

 

A Year of Time | 1.5.24

A Year of Time | 1.5.24

Life can be very curious and last April I stumbled into this conversation with Jenny Odell. It was the beginning of time showing up for me… nudging me… as I moved through my year with Authenticity. I could not get the conversation with Jenny Odell out of my mind and I have listened to it again and again. I also began to write down the time nudges as the year went on. There were so many of them!

What songs are audible when the wind stops? What has been kept alive in the time snatched from work and sheltered from ongoing destructionwhat moments of recognition, what ways of relating, what other imagined worlds, what other selves? What other kinds of time?

What other kinds of time indeed!!

So welcome to my Year of Time! I can remember the first time I heard The Rolling Stones singing about  “time being on my side” and I can tell you that at age 63, I no longer believe time is on my side… but rather I have gotten to the portion of my life journey where my time reality is finite. So how can I maximize my finite minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years that I might have left? That is what I want to explore this year… stepping away from the finiteness of time… and perhaps finding moments where I can make time seem less measured!

Of course there is a Mary Oliver poem… right? The quote above is from Mary’s poem, Invitation published in Red Bird in 2008. It advantageously crossed my path in December and I have been reading it almost daily. It is all about the idea of stopping and listening to the goldfinches… finding the time… taking the time… slowing the time… to stop and appreciate the goldfinch song.

Which is ironic really, because the conversation with Jenny Odell is all about trying to find more “vertical” time in our lives where time is very linear… structured… filled.

So I hope you will come along with me as I search for more “vertical” time… and perhaps discover a plethora of other kinds of time. 

Why? Well.. the closing words of Mary’s poem perhaps hold the answer:

It could mean something.
It could mean everything.
It could be what Rilke meant, when he
wrote:
You must change your life.

Amen, dear Rilke… and so I begin to uncover the delights of time! (and I am so incredibly excited!)

Forward… with Authenticity | December 2023

Forward… with Authenticity | December 2023

If all difficulties were known at the outset of a long journey, most of us would never start out at all. — Dan Rather

It has been quite the journey… one that began way back in 2019 with Focus. I never imagined that it would have taken this long path… and when I began this year I did not know if there would be another “building block” in my journey… and as the year draws to a close, no additional “building block” word has surfaced. I am feeling like that is a very good thing. However, it is not a journey finished… it is rather a journey that will not end. I have learned incredible things about myself over the last 5 years!

And this year had some very incredible, informative, eye-opening moments as I worked through authenticity. I learned that being authentic starts with myself… to myself… for myself.

The year also had some struggles… I made an effort to take a photo of myself each month… print it out and saved in my journal. I end the year no more comfortable with “self-photography” than I was in January but that is okay… it will be a part I carry forward next year… more practice, more photos, more journaling… and hopefully more comfort!

The other “new thing” I did this year was that journal! A separate, special “log” each month of the year… not an “artistic” journal, but one that for me was more approachable… and authentic. This will be something I carry forward as well. I like being able to go back and read when I am feeling stuck… it is a delightful way to see how far I have come!

It feels so very good to move beyond this very long journey… and I am so excited for where I will go next year!

A huge thanks to Carolyn for hosting us… It feels so good to be on a journey with the camaraderie of fellow “word” friends. I always learn so much from the things everyone shares!

I will reveal my new word once I have done a bit of “year end” housekeeping next week! Happy New Year everyone!

(and a reminder, there will be no Unraveled Wednesday post this week!)

** Photo by Johannes Plenio

Authenticity, for real | November 2023

Authenticity, for real | November 2023

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. — Ralph Waldo Emerson

This has truly been a good year… but… during the month I did not “think” much about my word. However, I journaled quite a bit and as I sat down to pull this post together it occurs to me that authenticity has become reality for me.

I am very comfortable speaking up for myself. This is perhaps the most impressive thing I have written here! I certainly journaled about it lots this month! And I am happy to say that speaking up for myself does not mean I am offending anyone… or not being nice… or being difficult.

I embraced “not knowing” things I did not know… i.e. if someone (Steve mostly) asked me about something obscure that I did not know… I could just say, ‘I don’t know’ and it felt so good! (Likewise, I did not feel the need to know or learn about what he asked… I was entirely comfortable is my ‘I don’t know’ response and I discovered that sometimes that thing (whatever it is) that pops into his head does not need a solution or an answer. (Thank you, dearest Rilke for that invaluable ‘live the question’ advice!)

I have a very comfortable routine for my days – perhaps too comfortable. Too comfortable is one of those danger zones for me… it can become complacent, which is never, ever good. So I am shaking up my “normal” routine with a new painting class (that begins tomorrow.) This one has weekly homework, so I will ignite the “good student” inside me and break out of myself a bit!

And I am feeling very, very ready to be done with this word… in past years, I have felt some sorrow as the year ended because I really felt that I had more to learn. This year that is not the case at all and I am eager to take my authentic self into the New Year with a very clean slate!

As always, I am so thankful for Carolyn gathering us all together. Do stop and see how everyone did in their journey this month!

Happy Monday everyone! See you all back here on Wednesday for some unraveling!

 

 

 

The Habit of Authenticity | October 2023

The Habit of Authenticity | October 2023

The start of this month again found me feeling like I am done with this word. And yesterday these thoughts were firmly in my head as I sat down to try and scrabble together a blog post… and surprise, surprise! Ten months in and I found I still have things to learn in my quest for authenticity.

At least that is what I discovered when I sat down and looked back over my journal writing this month… and the month before… and the month before that…and all the way back to January when I began this journey.

Pro tip… if you are feeling done… stuck… at the end… go back and read your journey… if you think you have learned nothing this will show you clearly just how much you have learned, how much you have put into practice, how much things have changed!

Gentle Readers… it seems that I have (finally!!) cultivated the habit of authenticity. A Will Durant quote sort of fit perfectly for this month… that is once I tweaked it a bit and it will be my mantra next month!

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence Authenticity, then, is not an act, but a habit.

Yes, I think this is the month that authenticity has become a habit! And that is such a very good thing. The biggest thing I noted was the absence of the “fake it until you make it” attitude with myself… i.e. those days when I am not authentic with myself.

Now, don’t get me wrong… I do not think there is anything wrong with “faking it until you make it”… it works for so many things! But there is something very wrong with it if my modus operandi is faking it to myself… I have found that being authentic does not have a negative effect on my attitude, but rather a profoundly positive impact. It means taking Rilke’s idea of living the question… and actually doing that. No fake answers… being okay with just authentically living… and maybe… just maybe I will discover, as Rilke did, that I will eventually live into the answers…uncertainty and all!


I would like to thank Carolyn for holding this space for us. Please stop by and see how everyone did this month!

I will see you all back here on Wednesday for some unraveling.

Practicing Authenticity | September 2023

Practicing Authenticity | September 2023

Nine months in with my word and some days I feel really ready to move on… others… well, the many more other days I feel like the struggle is real.

Practice is the hardest part of learning, and training is the essence of transformation.
Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are

Thank you, Ann Voskamp for that quote to remind me that practicing is indeed the hardest part of learning… but it is necessary to changing/learning/growing/being.

So this month, I have been practicing… and it has not been easy at all.

I went back and pulled out my Authenticity Manifesto and looked at it to see if I could find my struggles… and almost instantly I did.

Less-Controlling Kat, where are you?

Defining one’s struggles this easily should mean it would be easy to move past them, to let go of them, to release them… but no, I am living proof it is not.

So this month… I stumbled… and I struggled more… and I reacquainted myself with my word and my goals…but it was a challenging month and I will absolutely keep practicing!

As always, I want to thank Carolyn for providing us all a space to share our progress!

See you all back here on Wednesday!

 

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