An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

I am joining Honoré and friends again this month to share an update on my word.

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen Hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is. — Mary Anne Radmacher

I am discovering that living intentionally in Coronavirus Times can be more steps backwards than forward. July was one of those months. In a very big way.

There were so many steps back (I shared a bit here) and it felt a bit like a month of failure. But as I look back and contemplate, perhaps that is not one hundred percent true. I found that my day was a bit like filling buckets… time spent filling my meditation bucket, time spent reading, time spent knitting, and the largest bucket of all… my garden where I spent oodles of hours watering, picking, and tending…in the 900 gazillion degree weather. My garden truly needed my attention and it was an excellent diversion.

But I also intentionally ignored many things…the internet and my PC topped that list. I learned that living with intention means stepping back from things that are not good for you…finding a new rhythm and breaking the cycle that was fueling my stress. All that was surprisingly easy, which is shocking to me – who knew I was so good at avoidance! Haha! I think August will be another month to avoid those things that are stress-inducing.

No big “ah-ha” moments, but a series of small “oh!” moments worked for me!

You can see all of my Intentional Journey here.

 

An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

Intentional Living…finally | June 2020

I am joining Honoré again this month to share an update on my word!

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen Hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is. — Mary Anne Radmacher

Six months in and I finally got it!
What intentional living is. What is should be. What it feels like.

And it is incredible!!

News Flash: I have been living such an unintentional life!!

Aimless (yes, maybe focused aimlessness…but still so aimless!) I am sad that it took almost four months of at-home-quarantine to figure it out. (but I am not sure I would have been able to any other way…)

I started out the year with an entirely different journey in my mind for this word. Haha! Well, it sure showed me!

So what changed? I finally gave up trying to pick the path and let the word show me where I needed to be. I stopped fighting it and gave myself over to it.

Here is what this month revealed to me:

Time in meditation is the best time I can give myself. And meditation paired with some time listening and a bit of writing sets the best tone for the day. (Listening, you ask? Yes… listening. Some days it is poetry, some days it is nature, and some days it is listening for a still small voice.) I have done some form of mediation regularly for a very long time, but this quarantine has helped me hone my meditation skills… or maybe it is that there is less on my “shopping list” (see below) and that has helped remove the noise and just be immersed in the meditation time.

Time mindlessly shopping was such a colossal waste. We have been grocery shopping once every 4-ish weeks…and you know what? We have not run out of things…once. I have not done any “clothing shopping” at all this year and have not died and my wardrobe is not lacking (see Me Made May for proof of that!) No aimless wandering in a store buying things out of boredom.

This month I’ve gone to bed earlier and I am sleeping better and waking up easier! (Most nights that is… sometimes the news just can’t be avoided and then queue the tossing and turning with a dose of worry)

I am giving up trying to control.all.the.things! (it’s a work in progress…) And as a result, I have started to stop worrying about those things. (okay, maybe not entirely…but I am working on it…see above, lol)

Now, here we are on the last day of June and I am excited to see what Intentional Living will look like in July.

You can see my Intentional Journey here.

 

An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

when INTENTION is all I have | May 2020

I am joining Honoré today and sharing my Little Word update for the month!

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen Hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is. — Mary Anne Radmacher

I am positive that this was not the word I should have picked for 2020 because here we are closing out May, and my struggle with intention continues. This was absolutely not what I ever imagined when I settled in with a word for 2020 late last year.

Words like uncertainty, circumspect, and home-body seem like they might have been better word choices, but I am not a quitter – so onward with intention!

But Mary Anne Radmacher’s quote still beckons and this month Choose with no regret has become my daily mantra. And sometimes I was even successful!

  • All month long as areas began to “open up” I confidently elected to stay home.
  • We have a Primary Election next week so I applied for a mail in ballot… and sent it in.
  • I trimmed my hair.
  • I have not yet given myself a pedicure, but I have been using this delightful scrub regularly accompanied by a foot massage!
  • I wrote more, thought more, and read more.
  • I had long (and frequent) conversations with my kids…perhaps talking longer than we would in person!
  • I spent time knitting (of course) and practicing my meager crochet skills.
  • I wrote down little bits of gratitude every day, even when it was hard.
  • I also found myself back in the circle of grief, visiting stages I thought I was done with.

Choose with no regret was absolutely what I needed this month.

You can see my Intentional Journey here.

 

 

 

An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

Intentional Living in the Age of Social Distancing | 4.28.20

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen Hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is. — Mary Anne Radmacher

When I started this journey to be more intentional, I had no idea that Mary Anne Radmacher’s quote would stay with me in my journey. Yet, it is – and this month I found her words to Practice wellness and Appreciate your friends were just what I needed in Stay at Home Life.

And so, I have spent the month practicing wellness by staying home.

April 7, I began stitching my 100 Day Project. I had spent much of January and February plotting and planning out what I wanted this project to be. I started off eagerly; excited each day to sit with my stitching. One edge was completed, and some niggling worries began to creep in. What if it doesn’t work out like I planned? A couple of days the uneasiness – the uncertainty – kept me from stitching. I spent some time with that uncertainty and discovered that it was not the stitching, but my inner nay-saying voice creeping in. The answer for me was not to argue with that voice, but to tell myself that even if it does not “turn out” it will be okay…and believe it, and intentionally ignore that nay-saying voice.

About mid-month I noticed some significant changes in my life.

My meditation time became easier. I found I did not need to set a time to “stay” meditating. Rather, I welcomed the silence, the breathing, and especially the listening! Being comfortable with the stillness and just listening has been so helpful in these stressful days.

I joined Katie in her Reading Through the Gospels Lenten Journey and at the end of Lent, I just kept going. Kym sent me a wonderful little Intention Journal and I am filling it with notes as I read.

And that brings me to my next focus of the month… my friends. That number includes all of you, Gentle Readers! From your comments, your suggestions, your kindnesses – You make my days better and my life is so much richer because of you! Thank you!

My local Knit Group’s weekly Zoom Meetings have become a thing that I anticipate with great joy. We laugh, we bitch, we share. I did not imagine these women would become such a vital part of my week… but they have, and I am better because of them!

I guess all this means that I have somehow found the path again, and I am profoundly grateful that I have!

I am very happy that Honoré hosts us each month! Please, head over here to see a round up of word updates!

You can see my Intentional Journey here.

An Intentional Being | 7.28.20

Missing Intention | March 2020

Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen Hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Appreciate your friends. Continue to learn. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is. — Mary Anne Radmacher

Oh boy, can you say Intention Derailment? I feel like I am living on the edge.

Stuck on that dammed edge, wishing like hell that I could go back to last years word… to pick it up and wrap it around me because I really need something familiar right now. Something easy.

And then I read this:

Whenever something bad happens, keep calm, take a few deep breaths and shift the focus to something positive. — Roy T. Bennett

Yep, that is where I am right now… trying to stay calm, trying to breathe, and unsuccessfully seeking anything positive.

If this was all just about me only…I think I’d be fine with little or no hiccups in my day. But every day there seems to be some new thing to be concerned about for those I love (specifically my kids) and, honestly, it is damned hard to “put on a happy face” or find something positive.

But I have discovered that even small breaths are good. And faking calm works in a pinch – or at least for the duration of a phone call, then all bets are off.

And silent tears sometimes are the most positive thing in a day.

And that is all I’ve got.

Now, please go visit Honoré and see what everyone else has!

You can see my Intentional Journey here.

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