by Kat | Feb 13, 2026 | General, In This Moment
And we: spectators always, everywhere,
turned toward it all and never looking out!
Everything overfills us. We put it in order. It falls apart.
We order it again and fall apart ourselves.
— Rainer Maria Rilke, A portion of the Eighth Elegy from the Duino Elegies, translation by Mark S. Burrows
This has absolutely been my world since last November… overwhelmed by everything, trying to make sense of the senseless, and everything, everywhere falling apart. And let me tell you… being immersed into profound grief when the entire world is a shite show… well, there were some moments that I wanted to crawl in a hole and pull the dirt over me and just be done with it all.
From the end of November through all of December and most of January, I barely could keep track of what day of the week it was. And most days I did not keep track at all. I was thankful for the technology that reminded me when to get out of bed, when to take medications, and when to “begin winding down” from the day.
But, somewhere in January I began to notice different things. The sky in the morning was the first thing I really noticed…. it was not really black anymore but a beautiful indigo gradient. I don’t think I ever remember noticing this phenomenon before, although I am certain it has done this for millennia. And each day, despite the unbelievable cold, I was so eager to get outside to see those early morning skies.
Something had an order and it did not require any work from myself at all. I could just be there to experience it.
And then something even more miraculous happened as February inched in… I had what I classify as a “normal” conversation with my son. We talked about everything and nothing and then more nothing. And I felt a huge worry begin to melt… I guess I did not realize that my worry for him was as overwhelming as it was, and I knew it was overwhelming… but wow… once that change happened, I realized how much of a burden that was.
And I am happy to report that I am mostly back to keeping track of the days. The world is still a shit show. Lots of things still don’t make sense. I have filled the hole in and moved past it. But I am less concerned with putting things in order that I cannot control… and as for being a spectator? Well, the shit show continues… but so do those glorious indigo skies and I am betting next week I will have some snowdrops popping up in my yard!
Header photo by HASAN ZAHRA
by Kat | Feb 9, 2026 | General, In This Moment
Whew, after a very mild start…we plunged into the deep end of winter. Yes, it has been cold and wintry here in the south hills of Pittsburgh! But as we inch past the half way point, I am finding some uplifting things to bolster my days! Daylight being the best and brightest of all the things!
My early outings with Frankie (not really walks as it has been much too cold to do that, but we do amble about a bit) have a sky that is now a deep indigo rather than being black as night! And this past week, the hints at the coming sunrise have been gorgeous despite the bitterly cold air temps. Now, these have not been wildly colorful sunrises, but beautiful pale pinks and oranges… almost like a watercolor painting in their translucence. And yet they are so fleeting… a moment there and the next gone. A good reminder that though this weather is here today… it too will soon be gone and so I am savoring these wintry days.
And yes, these bitterly cold days have been accompanied by loads of bright sunshine and I love every bit of that! The angle of the sun is perfection right now, it streams in the windows brightening every single room! It is the best thing about this time of year and I will take these cold sunny days over cloudy milder days.
My thoughts were filled this past week with all the bulbs that are tucked away beneath the snowy blanket. At this time last year… (and for most previous years as well) I had snowdrops blooming. We are supposed to have a big warm up this week and I have been thinking that it might be fun to have snowdrops sprouting up with a bit of snow still on the ground!
And speaking of the weather, I have had an idea rambling around in my head for a long time and I think this might be the year for it to step beyond the thinking stage and into reality. So I have been doing some “prep work” since January… charting temperature highs and lows and jotting a note or two about the days weather. A couple of years ago Jo Avery (who is all kinds of inspiring when it comes to temperature textiles) created a book of the temps and weather. I like the idea of making it really just as simple as she did… a small square reflecting the high temp, a circle reflecting the low temp and a few stitches to indicate the weather. Right now I am working on figuring out fabrics… unlike hers (which is measured in Celsius) I will need to have “ranges of temps” in the Fahrenheit scale. Believe me, I have contemplated using Celsius, which would make things much simpler however my expansive knowledge of temperatures on the Celsius scale is limited to 0°C and 100°C. Anyways, I am closer to gathering all the bits… and I hope to begin this shortly after I finish The Great February Bang Out a Sweater-a-thon! (I knit a lot over the weekend and still have miles to go before I get to the sleeve divide but more on that on Wednesday!)
Header photo by Ylanite Koppens and though it has been too cold for any snowman making in my neighborhood, I am hopeful that this week’s warm up will provide the requisite moisture for the snow to hold together and some snowpeople begin popping up!
by Kat | Jan 13, 2025 | General, In This Moment
Is for reveling in winter!
Yes, we have snow! Yes, it is cold! (although this morning’s 31°F felt downright balmy!!)
I cannot tell you the last time we here had snow that stayed on the ground for more than a day or two! It is simply delightful.
Winter might be even more delightful because I finished one Marled Sequence Scarf over the weekend! And, to be entirely honest with you, I was more than a bit sad to bind off that last stitch! This was truly knitting perfection… the colors pair with simple knits and purls. Glamor shots coming!
But… I had also signed up for Patty Lyons Beginnings and Endings Class last Friday. I got through one part, with two more to go but can I just say… Patty Lyons is a treasure! I could sit and just listen to her talk for hours! She has encyclopedic knitting knowledge! Anyways, I also swatched over the weekend and cast on a couple of times… with “meh” results. But once I deployed Patty’s first cast on… with rousing success… I knew I found my new knit project to see me through this month!
So, my dearest Mother Nature, when you bring the drop in temperatures later today with those “need all the layers” teens, I will have lots to keep me occupied inside where it is cosy and warm! And, I will have a freshly washed scarf to keep me warm!
Happy Monday Everyone!
by Kat | Mar 18, 2024 | General, In My Backyard
Today is a day for celebration! It is the last full day of winter!!
And yet…I have savored these 13 weeks slowly and thoughtfully as I read one essay a week with Margaret Renkl. It was the most aware winter of my life and I am celebrating every moment of winter as it draws to a close.
But!!
I am also full of excitement to welcome the arrival of spring tomorrow! My hope is that the next 13 weeks as I immerse myself in spring will be as full of delights as the winter weeks were!
No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn. ― Hal Borland
I love this quote from Borland… he has some of the best wisdom as one moves from one season to another. Especially as the “edges” of seasons can overlap each other a bit. I won’t be shocked if winter pushes back on spring a bit and I have loved the spring-like days that have been creeping into winter!
About mid-February, we jumped on the Bird Buddy band wagon and have had loads of fun with it. And while I am contemplating some modifications to deter the bigger birds, thus far it is providing maximum delight! I discovered we have a Titmouse who has a little yellow band… so that is kind of fun! (I also reported my banded bird sighting!) I am laughing out loud at the antics of the Common Grackle! I am not sure there is another bird on the planet (or at least in my backyard) with a better stare down! And although the Bird Buddy has not gotten any woodpecker snaps, they are loving it as well! As does our local squirrel family, of course!
The deer also are enjoying the new feeder… no snaps of them yet either, but I live in hope! Saturday morning, I was delighted to see a ‘trail’ of deer fur across my back yard… they must be shedding for the spring! The birds made short work of it as the morning sun dried the frosty ground… some wee baby birds will have lovely soft nests! Making sure I am taking in all that is around me has opened my eyes to things that probably happened before, but I was not looking for them so I missed out on the wonder and the joy!
Somehow, Margaret Renkl’s wisdom each week astounds me anew (I had previously read The Comfort of Crows) but as I read “Praise Song for a Spring I Was Not Alive to See” I was profoundly struck by how similar her thoughts are with the thoughts of Andri Snær Magnason, as he talks about sitting in the same space with his 94 year old grandmother and his daughter as they contemplate the daughter’s grandchildren and the connection between them all. (I am savoring On Time and Water currently.) The idea that this coming spring is a spring my dearest Nana would have experienced as a young girl… and that someday Vivi’s grandchildren will experience the same spring. (at least that is my hope that there will still be spring in the future.) These are thoughts that fill my heart with deep joy as I contemplate a connectedness that moves beyond time.
And of course, there’s this…
So many birds are singing and singing and singing. — Margaret Renkl, The Comfort of Crows
And there you have a glimpse into my backyard as I bid winter a fond farewell and welcome spring with open arms!
Happy Last Day of Winter everyone!
by Kat | Feb 10, 2023 | General, In This Moment
Hello Friday… it’s been a week where my motto has been this: “The hurrieder I go, the behinder I get”
I have felt like I have been playing catch up all week but there were a few good things.
Thing One: I have had tremulous buds on my snow drops for weeks and I feared that the bit of an arctic blast we had last week would do them in. But as you can see above, bloom they did! They opened yesterday and it was fun to see them “dancing in the wild winds” we had! A very good thing for the list!
Thing Two: I got my homework done! Wooo! The theme for this week was “Atmospheric” and while I don’t think I quite achieved an “atmospheric painting,” Rick’s first comment in my feedback: “This reads well” was enough for me. He then gave me some ideas to “fix” my foreground trees… that look a bit like lollypops! Yes, they do!
Thing Three: Kareem Abdul Jabar’s response to having his decades long NBA Scoring Record broken by Lebron James on Tuesday night. I deeply loved watching Kareem play basketball, but I confess… I love even more where he has gone with his life post-basketball.
Thing Four: I stumbled entirely accidentally upon the Emergence Magazine Podcast a couple of weeks ago and I have been meaning to tell you about it. The episode that drew me in was one with Robin Wall Kimmerer talking about Serviceberries. It’s absolutely worth a listen and I been delighted with other episodes as well!
Thing Five: Otherwise known as The Things That Kept Me Behind This Week! I had the appointment with the NP which caused me to have to go for X-rays (which were inconclusive) but I called to make the referral appointment with the Ortho who I eventually did manage to make contact with and set an appointment. Because I was in “Appointment Mode” I also made the appointment for my annual mammogram. I mean what is not to love about calling into Doctor Office Phone Queues and making sure you are pressing the correct number for what you want to do… and then waiting… listening to Hold Music… with interspersed advertisements for UPMC… Oh! And could you please complete a survey for us at the end of this call! (Because who does not want to have the opportunity to push more numbers!!)
And with that, I have some things to finish (still) from this week. See you all back here on Monday!
