There are a few times in life when you leap up and the past that you’d been standing on falls away behind you, and the future you mean to land on is not yet in place, and for a moment you’re suspended knowing nothing and no one, not even yourself. — Ann Pachett, The Dutch House
Oh boy, another Monday.
It seems like last week the world began to be more topsy-turvy, and overflowing with uncertainty. I cannot get Danny’s voice out of my head because how he describes it is exactly so! The footing has fallen away, and the firmer future is still 58 days away. So here I am, suspended in knowing nothing and no one… not even myself.
I don’t like feeling so helpless with this uncertainty. One thing that is definitely certain – this virus is here and active. Sadly, not everyone gets that, or is it really that not everyone cares? But out in that “not everyone cares” world, are those I hold most dear. There they are braving places where the virus is like a speeding train… work. And I am truly at a loss this morning. Honestly, I am just so damned mad at people, ALL THE PEOPLE!!
I was certain that there would be no magic to fix all of this, but then this morning I heard this poem by Joy Harjo and as I let the words wash over me, I felt the tiniest crack in the dread… the uncertainty.
To pray you open your whole selfTo sky, to earth, to sun, to moonTo one whole voice that is you.And know there is moreThat you can’t see, can’t hear;Can’t know except in momentsSteadily growing, and in languagesThat aren’t always sound but otherCircles of motion.
What a beautiful poem! Thank you.
I am grateful for you and Kym bringing poetry into my day.
All the chaos, uncertainty, and waiting until Jan. 20th certainly adds to the anxiety, uncertainty, and waiting that has become the norm this year. But I am looking forward to your FOs!
ack, the uncertainty. I hear you. I’ve been reading Pema Chodron’s ‘Comfortable with Uncertainty’ each morning, and boy, is it getting a test. Our morning started with a notification of yet-to-be-announced lay-offs at Troy’s company. A grand way to start an already-stunted holiday week! Of course, they’ve announced that they’re coming–but haven’t said when they’ll inform anyone of specifics. Nice… Trying to breathe through it and trust.
One thing that this year has taught me, again and again, is that I have to accept living with uncertainty. I don’t like it, but it’s a fact of life right now. There are things that I can control and it’s better for my sanity to focus on them instead of the many big things I can’t control — and to remember that for all the idiots out there making things harder for us, there are also some very smart, very talented people working overtime to make things better!
My second son, Brian, has this expression: “It is what it is…until it’s something else!”
I take it to mean: as things change (for better or for worse), we just have to find a way to deal with them. Easier said than done, for sure!!
I am so hopeful that the vaccines are around the corner and they cannot come soon enough. Uncertainty is a certainty for this whole year – I hope 2021 has some pockets of normalcy..
Poetry really does help steady the soul!
Movements can start small! (also, I did a little browsing for fountain pens over the weekend, and I love that the ad below your post is more enabling!!)
Poetry feeds our souls and Joy Harjo writes beautifully. In The Poetry Handbook Mary Oliver wrote, “For poems are not words, after all, but fires for the cold, ropes let down to the lost, something as necessary as bread in the pockets of the hungry.” Amen.
It has been a year of uncertainty isn’t it. The future is always uncertain to some degree but we always had some certainty in there too didn’t we. We have tipped the balance which is so unsettling. I hope you can find some of the things that you can be certain of and hold onto to them.