The Think Write Thursday prompt for this week is to write about the ways I stay positive when it feels like everything is going wrong. What do I do to get through those times and stay focused on the good?
For me the answer is not to make lemonade out of the crisis/issue/problem. Some problems cannot be sweetened or made better no matter how hard you try.
My solution when there is an issue/crisis/problem is to focus on something else entirely. And, not in an ignore the issue/crisis/problem kind of way, but instead it is a way for me to not get mired down in the issue/crisis/problem.
I want to stay “out of the pit” and approach it with a better view. I won’t solve anything if I am drowning with the problem.
Now, that does not always equate to staying positive, but it does help me keep my focus.
The other thing that I find extremely helpful is that I do not believe that every problem needs to be solved or has a solution. Sometimes it can’t be – and maybe the solution is to have a different focus.
I try to focus inward (perhaps you might even call it internalizing!!) Or, I might journal about the problem or I might meditate about it or I might even laugh about it. But, what I don’t like to do is to talk about the problem or solicit advice regarding the problem. This is in part because I have a huge aversion to being told what to do nor do I want you to “solve it for me”. I really do want to muddle through it on my own and in my own time.
So, when the life gives you lemons, my advice is to take a deep breath and eat a Clementine or two!
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I try to be positive but sometimes I can’t. I find that if I focus on a knitting project – that makes me forget whatever it is that is on my mind. I treasure and savor those days when nothing is on my mind!!
I absolutely love your approach! “Some problems cannot be sweetened or made better no matter how hard you try” is so true and succinct. Far too often I find myself drowning in the problem, but I am going to make a concerted effort to eat more clementines. Thank you!
I think sometimes when you actively think about something else your mind works behind the scenes and comes up with a solution. I also like the idea of recognizing that some problems just can’t be solved.
There is a Jan Brett children’s book I used to read my kids at Christmastime — The Wild Christmas Reindeer. The main character, Teeka, got all in a bungle because the reindeer’s antlers tangled together, and the harder she worked to untangle the antlers and free the reindeer, the more STUCK they became. Ultimately, when she just quit forcing the issue, the reindeer freed themselves. Anyway . . . your post reminded me of that story. Sometimes it’s best to just . . . eat some clementines!
Another person who journals! I have really found that helpful over the past year, moreso than in all the years before it, probably because this past year has been the most challenging. I find that sometimes I crave my journal and cannot wait to get through the work day or some other event so that I can have some solitude and my journal. I suppose it’s like a steam bath for the soul.
Sometimes I take the Scarlett O’Hara approach: “I’ll think about it tomorrow.” And if I “broke” it and can’t fix it, or even if I can, I always own up…and do the best I can.
I have not been journaling but I need to add that to my bag. And something sweet is a great help – coffee too!
I like that thought process…some things can’t be fixed and maybe the solution is to have a different focus. Kind of like my way may not be the only way! Regretfully!:-)
Yes, yes, yes. I am the same. Don’t try to solve the problem, don’t try to help me solve the problem (unless I ask). I know very well that I will work things work out (or I won’t). Life has a way of going on despite it all.
Yes! sometimes the problem resolves itself without me even having to take action … or my feelings about the problem will change and a solution might appear. or maybe I’ll just get to enjoy clementines.